46…

I usually don’t care about getting older.

In fact, I’m typically throwing some grand to-do to celebrate…turning it into a major event that includes several girlfriends and a beer or two.

‘Cept this year…it’s feeling a little strange.

This year, I’ll be heading to Cuba with The Tall Blonde for a week of relaxation on May 30th…the day before my actual birthday. The typical “girls get together” for drinks and laughs will be a more tamed down Mom and Daughter version…with Cuban music…and umbrella drinks.

But besides the fact that I won’t be home for a downtown traditional celebration with my girlfriends and a made-up birthday song from Cory and Paul at the Deck…there’s something about being closer to 50 than I am to 40…that really bugs me.

46 is a strange number. It’s a round-up to fifty rather than round down to 40 kind of number. It’s a “you should be thinking about retirement” rather than starting all over kind of number.

I’m never really bothered by the number…but this time…it’s getting to me. Usually I feel half my age and most people would agree that I’ve the maturity of a nit…but lately…I feel old in ways I never felt old before. A sore back, constant issues with allergies and this ever persistent feeling that I need bifocals isn’t helping. Not being on my feet, still struggling to work through some tough spots, putting the house on the market…it’s all adding to a sense of “I’m too old for this crap.”

When my back went last week after painting the ceiling and working endlessly to get the house ready to put on the market…Snuff told me I needed both “a new house and a new body!” I wanted to wrap my age-spotted hands around his twenty-four year old neck and give him a hearty shake.

Part of the problem at the moment…I’m tired and for the first time in a long time…I actually feel my age. I’m working too much…trying to hard. I’m that hamster spinning on a wheel getting absolutely nowhere but dizzy.

The trip to Cuba is a welcome break. While I won’t be hamming it up with my girlfriends…I’ll be in a position where I’m forced to relax! There won’t be any need to keep the house clean, to drive kids to various activities, to work on building more clients or write my blog…there won’t be a phone, computer or social media to distract me. Just me, my best girl, a half-dozen books, sand between my toes, warmth in my bones and a drink in hand.

And maybe…by the time I get home…I’ll feel a little more rested…a little bit younger…and ready to take on the world again. Maybe, by the time I get home, everything will feel new again…and 46 won’t feel so old!

Thanks to Air Canada for sending me on this AWESOME adventure! Check out the daily deals by scrolling down to the Air Canada advertisement on the right side of my blog.